from here
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Monday, April 18, 2011
Dear A
I am feeling a huge lump of air in my liver trying to burst out.
First of all, I'd like to apologize.. For everything. I mean it - everything.
Everytime I talk to you, I feel like I'm throwing up garbage. I feel like such a liar. And even if I am, you wouldn't know it. Because you only associate me with good things.
In fact, you always feel like you don't deserve me; that I am better than you. But A, let me tell you, it is me who don't deserve you. I don't even deserve to acquaint a person such as you, let alone to hurt and to lie to.
When I pretended not to see you the other day, it is not because I don't want to talk to you, but it's because I worry I wouldn't be able to contain myself from crying.
I will cry, because I know I am not for you. Neither are you for me, even though I know you like to think otherwise. You see the glass as half full, and you have such a big heart, so you will not understand where I'm coming from.
Sometimes I wonder myself, why I am so unlucky. I was lucky enough to know you, but unlucky that I won't be able to have you.
I know, when we talk it feels like there is nothing in between us, you would get my jokes, and I would get yours. We could talk endlessly and confide in each other. As a matter of fact, I really care about you, genuinely always wanting to know that you are ok.
It humbles me to see you grow before my eyes - from a very shy person, to someone who is confident and successful. You think you have achieved nothing, but I think you should be proud of yourself.
I will never be all the other girls who would fall at your feet anytime. I will never be like all the girls that could be yours. I will only be me, and I have no intentions of changing you.
You will meet another girl, who you will fall in love with so deeply, that you will forget me. I will accept this although it saddens me to know that that girl can share her happiness with you. I will be jealous, and will probably take quite some time to let this feeling go.
You are a great person, brought up in a great family. Come to think of it, there is nothing that I don't like about you. If I must, then probably your optimism - how you always believe that things are ok, even though in reality they aren't.
Your smile, your doe eyes, the way you look at me and think I didn't notice.
For now, as a powerless human being, I can only say that if it's meant to be, it is meant to be. But lest if it's not, do know that I wish not to see you ever again, simply because the hurt will be unbearable.
Again, I am so sorry. At the risk of sounding cliche, please take comfort in knowing that at least, whatever feelings I have for you, and whatever "connection" we have had, is true.
Yours truly.
First of all, I'd like to apologize.. For everything. I mean it - everything.
Everytime I talk to you, I feel like I'm throwing up garbage. I feel like such a liar. And even if I am, you wouldn't know it. Because you only associate me with good things.
In fact, you always feel like you don't deserve me; that I am better than you. But A, let me tell you, it is me who don't deserve you. I don't even deserve to acquaint a person such as you, let alone to hurt and to lie to.
When I pretended not to see you the other day, it is not because I don't want to talk to you, but it's because I worry I wouldn't be able to contain myself from crying.
I will cry, because I know I am not for you. Neither are you for me, even though I know you like to think otherwise. You see the glass as half full, and you have such a big heart, so you will not understand where I'm coming from.
Sometimes I wonder myself, why I am so unlucky. I was lucky enough to know you, but unlucky that I won't be able to have you.
I know, when we talk it feels like there is nothing in between us, you would get my jokes, and I would get yours. We could talk endlessly and confide in each other. As a matter of fact, I really care about you, genuinely always wanting to know that you are ok.
It humbles me to see you grow before my eyes - from a very shy person, to someone who is confident and successful. You think you have achieved nothing, but I think you should be proud of yourself.
I will never be all the other girls who would fall at your feet anytime. I will never be like all the girls that could be yours. I will only be me, and I have no intentions of changing you.
You will meet another girl, who you will fall in love with so deeply, that you will forget me. I will accept this although it saddens me to know that that girl can share her happiness with you. I will be jealous, and will probably take quite some time to let this feeling go.
You are a great person, brought up in a great family. Come to think of it, there is nothing that I don't like about you. If I must, then probably your optimism - how you always believe that things are ok, even though in reality they aren't.
Your smile, your doe eyes, the way you look at me and think I didn't notice.
For now, as a powerless human being, I can only say that if it's meant to be, it is meant to be. But lest if it's not, do know that I wish not to see you ever again, simply because the hurt will be unbearable.
Again, I am so sorry. At the risk of sounding cliche, please take comfort in knowing that at least, whatever feelings I have for you, and whatever "connection" we have had, is true.
Yours truly.
Friday, April 15, 2011
Friday blues
A school friend gave me a call - it was unexpected. I was extremely glad she called, because a familiar voice was just what I needed at that time.
So we talked, about generic stuff - her sister is planning to take the course I took in uni and she had some questions.
Just as how you would feel when riding a bicycle after a long time not doing so, you just sort of ride like you never stopped doing it before. We quickly fell into the mould that we have had back then, and running jokes resurfaced, expected punchlines still surprised us, and we just kind of had a warm conversation altogether.
We then talked about the present. What each of us is currently doing. I as usual spoke of my not-too-bad job and how I am still surviving. She was happy to hear that.
And then it was her turn.
"Nothing new..", she said. I kind of can tell she was smiling when she said it.
"Oh come on, there must be something. So when are you getting married?!", I laughed.
"Err yea..actually, ermm, this coming November, if everything goes well..".
There was a pause. There shouldn't be.
"OMG. Are you for real?!?", I half shouted in the office.
"Hehe. Yes. Ey, don't tell anyone yet, you're the first person to know".
And I felt something building up in my tear duct.
That night, I was listening to the radio in the car ride home. My brother was quiet, and so was I.
And then, as if some spirits out there has been listening to me, a very dear song played on the radio.
Perfect timing.
I guess now I can just say that I shouldn't be embarrassed to admit it. I may not be the only one.
So Lonely by The Police
To sign off, here is a short poem:
Tomorrow is Saturday,
and in the office I will be, Yay.
So we talked, about generic stuff - her sister is planning to take the course I took in uni and she had some questions.
Just as how you would feel when riding a bicycle after a long time not doing so, you just sort of ride like you never stopped doing it before. We quickly fell into the mould that we have had back then, and running jokes resurfaced, expected punchlines still surprised us, and we just kind of had a warm conversation altogether.
We then talked about the present. What each of us is currently doing. I as usual spoke of my not-too-bad job and how I am still surviving. She was happy to hear that.
And then it was her turn.
"Nothing new..", she said. I kind of can tell she was smiling when she said it.
"Oh come on, there must be something. So when are you getting married?!", I laughed.
"Err yea..actually, ermm, this coming November, if everything goes well..".
There was a pause. There shouldn't be.
"OMG. Are you for real?!?", I half shouted in the office.
"Hehe. Yes. Ey, don't tell anyone yet, you're the first person to know".
And I felt something building up in my tear duct.
That night, I was listening to the radio in the car ride home. My brother was quiet, and so was I.
And then, as if some spirits out there has been listening to me, a very dear song played on the radio.
Perfect timing.
I guess now I can just say that I shouldn't be embarrassed to admit it. I may not be the only one.
So Lonely by The Police
To sign off, here is a short poem:
Tomorrow is Saturday,
and in the office I will be, Yay.
Thursday, April 14, 2011
life. and deaths
And so, the ordinariness of the every day things brought me back to earth. Small things, that are huge to others, made me realize how we are in fact insignificant, what more the things I witness which are beyond my comprehension.
My kitchen was flooded today, so was my current "bed room" in the house - living room in front of TV (coz lately I was too scared to sleep in the mini library downstairs where I reside with boxes of my things unpacked still; ever since I heard the story my sister told me - I'll tell later). Point is, comfort before misfortune. I sometimes take things for granted and disregard things that should matter.
I also saw two fat mama and papa rats the other day, running straight from the house roof and skydive onto the backyard. I didn't save them, I didn't yell "stupid rats!!" to them, I didn't do anything. I just let them splat there for a good 5 seconds before they dust of their coats and started running through the drain. Somehow this incident made me feel insignificant. Because (I have a point ok), they didn't need me to go to them with a broom and brush them away. They got back up by themselves and continue doing whatever rats do.
A few people I know lost their loved ones - of old age, of stress, of an accident. Within the span of a month, having to attend 3 funerals is quite draining. It gives you like a black washout effect on your face and you somehow feel obliged to grieve.. at least I do. I asked my Mom to braid my hair for work last Monday out of randomness because I dreamed about her drinking rotten milk to save my life. Yes, I don't really know how to show love properly. Believe it or not, especially to my Mom. Again, taking good care of what you have. Love before lost.
My sister went for an intensive safety course (yes she is a worrywart) where only a handful of people were allowed to participate. She took notes, and was excited when I came home from work because she wanted to share with me what she learned. I laughed when I first heard, but she insisted and forced me to sit with my mom (who was busy chatting and facebooking with her girlfriends) and listen to her. I thought it was going to be some boring-ass kiddy safety 101. But no, it was serious points about safety in taking cabs, how to deal with robbery at your house (this was what got me scared to sleep downstairs), at the ATM etc. She even forced my dad to sit and listen. Prevention better than cure. Safety is all about that - making sure there are no opportunities for unwanted things to happen.
How we became someone we don't plan to be. How we became someone we hated. How we became unknown to ourselves. Had some serious talk with some friends at work (some I regard more as friends than colleagues lol) and yes, this is what happens and is happening. I'm not sure if it has happened to me yet (I'm still pretty much myself I think. Haha), but I've seen it happen. In fact just today. So never say never (don't imagine Bieber now, I'm serious). Might be next.
Small gestures of kindness. Like the dude who held the door for me eventhough he has passed through, the cab driver who gave a discount of RM6 for a ride, the lady who smiled like mothers would when she saw me bang my head on the car boot at the petrol station, the hug of a good friend.. all of that has made me feel better this week.
And then there is this person. Whom I have liked for a reason, and still likes, for a different reason. I rarely meet him, but when I do.. well, time just stops, as they say. But I dare not say a word because I know there are mountains I have to climb before I reach the river. And a friend said, "these things are never easy eventhough they are". So I'll just take her word since she's the expert and I'm not.
As of right now, you can say I'm in a state of a mild shock. Because of all the deaths that's been recurring. I need to shower now, to cleanse off all the "bad things" one can get from a funeral.
Have a great weekend.
My kitchen was flooded today, so was my current "bed room" in the house - living room in front of TV (coz lately I was too scared to sleep in the mini library downstairs where I reside with boxes of my things unpacked still; ever since I heard the story my sister told me - I'll tell later). Point is, comfort before misfortune. I sometimes take things for granted and disregard things that should matter.
I also saw two fat mama and papa rats the other day, running straight from the house roof and skydive onto the backyard. I didn't save them, I didn't yell "stupid rats!!" to them, I didn't do anything. I just let them splat there for a good 5 seconds before they dust of their coats and started running through the drain. Somehow this incident made me feel insignificant. Because (I have a point ok), they didn't need me to go to them with a broom and brush them away. They got back up by themselves and continue doing whatever rats do.
A few people I know lost their loved ones - of old age, of stress, of an accident. Within the span of a month, having to attend 3 funerals is quite draining. It gives you like a black washout effect on your face and you somehow feel obliged to grieve.. at least I do. I asked my Mom to braid my hair for work last Monday out of randomness because I dreamed about her drinking rotten milk to save my life. Yes, I don't really know how to show love properly. Believe it or not, especially to my Mom. Again, taking good care of what you have. Love before lost.
My sister went for an intensive safety course (yes she is a worrywart) where only a handful of people were allowed to participate. She took notes, and was excited when I came home from work because she wanted to share with me what she learned. I laughed when I first heard, but she insisted and forced me to sit with my mom (who was busy chatting and facebooking with her girlfriends) and listen to her. I thought it was going to be some boring-ass kiddy safety 101. But no, it was serious points about safety in taking cabs, how to deal with robbery at your house (this was what got me scared to sleep downstairs), at the ATM etc. She even forced my dad to sit and listen. Prevention better than cure. Safety is all about that - making sure there are no opportunities for unwanted things to happen.
How we became someone we don't plan to be. How we became someone we hated. How we became unknown to ourselves. Had some serious talk with some friends at work (some I regard more as friends than colleagues lol) and yes, this is what happens and is happening. I'm not sure if it has happened to me yet (I'm still pretty much myself I think. Haha), but I've seen it happen. In fact just today. So never say never (don't imagine Bieber now, I'm serious). Might be next.
Small gestures of kindness. Like the dude who held the door for me eventhough he has passed through, the cab driver who gave a discount of RM6 for a ride, the lady who smiled like mothers would when she saw me bang my head on the car boot at the petrol station, the hug of a good friend.. all of that has made me feel better this week.
And then there is this person. Whom I have liked for a reason, and still likes, for a different reason. I rarely meet him, but when I do.. well, time just stops, as they say. But I dare not say a word because I know there are mountains I have to climb before I reach the river. And a friend said, "these things are never easy eventhough they are". So I'll just take her word since she's the expert and I'm not.
As of right now, you can say I'm in a state of a mild shock. Because of all the deaths that's been recurring. I need to shower now, to cleanse off all the "bad things" one can get from a funeral.
Have a great weekend.
Friday, April 08, 2011
lean closer, ladies
Three things:
1. I like beautiful men.
2. I like boys who grew up into beautiful men.
3. I like the grown up John, and he is a beautiful man.
Gone are the days of his messy mullet; and now sporting a neater, shorter hair with a fragile, couldn't-care-less rocker dude look.
I. Dig. It.
And the crooning of his just-got-outta-bed-and-imma-whisper-in-your-ear vocals.
Major. Dig.
Similar guys like John and John wannabes are invited to apply within. Hahas.
Also I noticed that the lyrics of their songs are always in favor of women/girls/chicks. I like I Must Be Dreaming and Whoever She Is (I forgot from which album, but like few years back).
Good job guys.
1. I like beautiful men.
2. I like boys who grew up into beautiful men.
3. I like the grown up John, and he is a beautiful man.
Roses by Outkast covered by The Maine
Gone are the days of his messy mullet; and now sporting a neater, shorter hair with a fragile, couldn't-care-less rocker dude look.
I. Dig. It.
And the crooning of his just-got-outta-bed-and-imma-whisper-in-your-ear vocals.
Major. Dig.
Similar guys like John and John wannabes are invited to apply within. Hahas.
Also I noticed that the lyrics of their songs are always in favor of women/girls/chicks. I like I Must Be Dreaming and Whoever She Is (I forgot from which album, but like few years back).
Good job guys.
Thursday, April 07, 2011
fuh-rai-day
Look at this photo.
And this photo.
What do Rebecca Black and this girl have in common?
THEY BOTH LOVE FRIDAY!
Friday is Playday. Woo to the Hoo.
And this photo.
What do Rebecca Black and this girl have in common?
THEY BOTH LOVE FRIDAY!
Friday is Playday. Woo to the Hoo.
Sunday, April 03, 2011
madhouse
Ayah ku seorang yang unik. Tahap keunikan beliau adalah agak tinggi berbanding mere mortals yang lain, dan oleh itu, beliau bercakap dalam bahasanya sendiri. Seringkali beliau akan menggunakan perkataan-perkataan pelik yang hanya kami yang faham (kadang-kadang tak faham juga). Mostly, it's his gastronomic vocabularies that are just beyond us.
Contoh 1:
Ayah: Izza, go and buy franchise.
Me: Huh? *looking at sisters* Buy what?
Ayah: Franchise..McD
Me: Err..french fries ke?
Ayah: Ye lah! What did I say just now?? Franchise kan?
Me: -.-" Berapa juta ringgit dia ada nak beli franchise..sigh
Contoh 2:
Ayah: Oh dah pukul 10 (malam) patut la lapar..
Ibu: Haa, nak makan la tuh? We just ate dinner!
Ayah: Biarlah, I nak makan. You nak makan I tak halang pun
Ibu: *gives up*
Me: Yeap, orders?
Ayah: Go and buy Nippies. Dua. Yang besar.
Me: Buy what??
Ayah: Nippies!!
Me: *consults sisters* Did he say nappies? Nipples?
Sis A: I think the chocolate that he likes tuh..
Sis B: Yang red packet rasanya, ada kacang inside..
Me: Nips?
Sisters: Haaaaa yes yes
Me: Ayah, Nips ke?
Ayah: Ya Allah, ye lah! Kenapa tak pergi lagi? Nak duit ke? You kan dah kerja!
Me: T.T
Contoh 3:
Ayah: Someone, tolong belikan Lot 10 please!
Everyone: Huh?! Buy what??
Ayah: Lot 10! Semua kena korek telinga lah!
Me (who else): Nak apa again? Lot 10? Yang shopping mall tuh?
Ayah: *annoyed* Lot 10 laa, yang ada mango punya flavor tuh..dia macam chewing gum sikit.
Me: Yellow packet? Yang kita beli masa nak balik kampung?
Ayah: Haa yea that's the one
Me: That's Lot 100 lah!!! You missed a zero.
Ayah: Oh yeke? Whatever lah. Go now.
Me: *pulls hair*
By now, you get a glimpse of what a crazy house I live in. And that's only just my dad. Wait until you know my siblings, annnndddd my mom. Seriously, it's a miracle I'm still alive and fabulous (hahs!)
Let's take a sneak peek at my mom's gibberish semantics. But for her, it revolves more around electrical appliances and kitchenware rather than food.
Contoh 1:
Ibu: Ya Allah, baju tak basuh lagi! Who wants to volunteer!!!
Me: (eventhough I don't want to, I know by volunteer means "somebody better do this before anyone gets killed!") Me! I'll do it!
Ibu: Do it now! Put the laundry in the fridge first before you go shower.
Me: Huh? Whaa? Fridge? Who?
Ibu: Put the laundry in the fridge before you shower! so that it can spin first then you finish shower go and hang them.
Me: You meant washing machine right? Not fridge? *snickers*
Ibu: What are you laughing at?! You'll be like that when you turn 40! then you'll know not to laugh!! *defensive*
Me: oookkaaayyyyy
Contoh 2:
Ibu: Izza! Please put the cili kering in the microwave!
Me: Microwave?
Ibu: Eh, microwave pula. Fridge!
Me: Fridge?
Ibu: Eh, apa nama tuh..mixer!
Me: Blender..
Ibu: Apa-apa lah! Cuba bergerak tu cepat sikit! Buat kerja kena pantas!!
Me: (dalam hati) Nak cover line, aku pula yang kena -.-"
And my brother, no exception.
Contoh 1:
Bro: Ibu, remember me at 6 please.
Ibu: Why, would I want to remember you at 6?
Bro: Alah, just remember la, got something to do..
Me: You mean "remind" you at 6?
Bro: Poyo lah. You get what I mean. Bye.
Haha, sounds like some slapstick comedy, but it's not. When I think about it, they are funny moments - in retrospect. But while they were happening, you feel so outraged because they got you all confused and then get angry at you for things you didn't do! I'm sure you got your own stories to tell too!
But anyways anyhow, I love my family (I have to, coz otherwise I don't really have anyone else to love other than myself and I don't want to end up being like Sue Sylvester where I have to marry myself), and as crazy as they get, they're blood. Sooo which means..I'm crazy too? Ha ha, spend a day with me to find out!
And speaking about me (err haha), I've been down with fever and it's not even funny. I hate not being able to do anything and just like lying in on the couch watching MasterChef and Glee on repeat. Lucky there's Parenthood, KUWTK and also some old school stuff I got my brother to download and to just plug the drive into the tv. Seriously, Unifi is uh-mazing. Hope I get better soon, else, it's a no-work day for me!
To the victims of the recent tsunami attack, hang in there, good things will come your way! Peace be to the world. Amen!
Contoh 1:
Ayah: Izza, go and buy franchise.
Me: Huh? *looking at sisters* Buy what?
Ayah: Franchise..McD
Me: Err..french fries ke?
Ayah: Ye lah! What did I say just now?? Franchise kan?
Me: -.-" Berapa juta ringgit dia ada nak beli franchise..sigh
Contoh 2:
Ayah: Oh dah pukul 10 (malam) patut la lapar..
Ibu: Haa, nak makan la tuh? We just ate dinner!
Ayah: Biarlah, I nak makan. You nak makan I tak halang pun
Ibu: *gives up*
Me: Yeap, orders?
Ayah: Go and buy Nippies. Dua. Yang besar.
Me: Buy what??
Ayah: Nippies!!
Me: *consults sisters* Did he say nappies? Nipples?
Sis A: I think the chocolate that he likes tuh..
Sis B: Yang red packet rasanya, ada kacang inside..
Me: Nips?
Sisters: Haaaaa yes yes
Me: Ayah, Nips ke?
Ayah: Ya Allah, ye lah! Kenapa tak pergi lagi? Nak duit ke? You kan dah kerja!
Me: T.T
Contoh 3:
Ayah: Someone, tolong belikan Lot 10 please!
Everyone: Huh?! Buy what??
Ayah: Lot 10! Semua kena korek telinga lah!
Me (who else): Nak apa again? Lot 10? Yang shopping mall tuh?
Ayah: *annoyed* Lot 10 laa, yang ada mango punya flavor tuh..dia macam chewing gum sikit.
Me: Yellow packet? Yang kita beli masa nak balik kampung?
Ayah: Haa yea that's the one
Me: That's Lot 100 lah!!! You missed a zero.
Ayah: Oh yeke? Whatever lah. Go now.
Me: *pulls hair*
By now, you get a glimpse of what a crazy house I live in. And that's only just my dad. Wait until you know my siblings, annnndddd my mom. Seriously, it's a miracle I'm still alive and fabulous (hahs!)
Let's take a sneak peek at my mom's gibberish semantics. But for her, it revolves more around electrical appliances and kitchenware rather than food.
Contoh 1:
Ibu: Ya Allah, baju tak basuh lagi! Who wants to volunteer!!!
Me: (eventhough I don't want to, I know by volunteer means "somebody better do this before anyone gets killed!") Me! I'll do it!
Ibu: Do it now! Put the laundry in the fridge first before you go shower.
Me: Huh? Whaa? Fridge? Who?
Ibu: Put the laundry in the fridge before you shower! so that it can spin first then you finish shower go and hang them.
Me: You meant washing machine right? Not fridge? *snickers*
Ibu: What are you laughing at?! You'll be like that when you turn 40! then you'll know not to laugh!! *defensive*
Me: oookkaaayyyyy
Contoh 2:
Ibu: Izza! Please put the cili kering in the microwave!
Me: Microwave?
Ibu: Eh, microwave pula. Fridge!
Me: Fridge?
Ibu: Eh, apa nama tuh..mixer!
Me: Blender..
Ibu: Apa-apa lah! Cuba bergerak tu cepat sikit! Buat kerja kena pantas!!
Me: (dalam hati) Nak cover line, aku pula yang kena -.-"
And my brother, no exception.
Contoh 1:
Bro: Ibu, remember me at 6 please.
Ibu: Why, would I want to remember you at 6?
Bro: Alah, just remember la, got something to do..
Me: You mean "remind" you at 6?
Bro: Poyo lah. You get what I mean. Bye.
Haha, sounds like some slapstick comedy, but it's not. When I think about it, they are funny moments - in retrospect. But while they were happening, you feel so outraged because they got you all confused and then get angry at you for things you didn't do! I'm sure you got your own stories to tell too!
But anyways anyhow, I love my family (I have to, coz otherwise I don't really have anyone else to love other than myself and I don't want to end up being like Sue Sylvester where I have to marry myself), and as crazy as they get, they're blood. Sooo which means..I'm crazy too? Ha ha, spend a day with me to find out!
And speaking about me (err haha), I've been down with fever and it's not even funny. I hate not being able to do anything and just like lying in on the couch watching MasterChef and Glee on repeat. Lucky there's Parenthood, KUWTK and also some old school stuff I got my brother to download and to just plug the drive into the tv. Seriously, Unifi is uh-mazing. Hope I get better soon, else, it's a no-work day for me!
To the victims of the recent tsunami attack, hang in there, good things will come your way! Peace be to the world. Amen!
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Friday, March 25, 2011
say hello to my new boyfriends
Subhanallah, or as Kimora Lee Simmons say it Hallelu.
My eyes were literally glued to the huge poster I saw of Topman Spring/Summer 2011 collection when I was passing by it for a good 2minutes.
And my little heart skipped a bit, saying to itself Who are these wonderful men that suddenly became my reason of beating?
Prepare to drool.
And my favorite guy in my favorite look:
The inward cheeks, the slight eyebags, the downward generous lashes, the stud, the expression. How many guys can rock the granny knit sweater? Exactly.
And Dan Felton, *sighs dreamily* is definitely like dipping your hand in a huge packet of M&M's - your hand is bound to get dirty, and you can't expect what color you'll get.
He is every girl's type - but he lost by a small margin to Spijkers coz he doesn't have the drowsy, dopey, bagged eyes. And this is imperative, in my books at least, as it gives the whole I-don't-give-a-shit attitude that I am so in love with.
And together, they make girls (like me) go to Topman and buy unnecessary slogan t-shirts and socks for their brothers/boyfriends just to stay a little longer in front of the cashier for the best fad/decor/item in the entire store - the poster (first photo).
I won't ask for a lot, just to spend forever looking at you (until time and age start to take over you lol).
My eyes were literally glued to the huge poster I saw of Topman Spring/Summer 2011 collection when I was passing by it for a good 2minutes.
And my little heart skipped a bit, saying to itself Who are these wonderful men that suddenly became my reason of beating?
Prepare to drool.
Milo Spijkers and Dan Felton. *heart bursting at the seams*
And my favorite guy in my favorite look:
Milo Spijkers; Milo at the mamak never taste the same anymore.
The inward cheeks, the slight eyebags, the downward generous lashes, the stud, the expression. How many guys can rock the granny knit sweater? Exactly.
And Dan Felton, *sighs dreamily* is definitely like dipping your hand in a huge packet of M&M's - your hand is bound to get dirty, and you can't expect what color you'll get.
Dan Felton - Dressed to undress (teeheehee)
He is every girl's type - but he lost by a small margin to Spijkers coz he doesn't have the drowsy, dopey, bagged eyes. And this is imperative, in my books at least, as it gives the whole I-don't-give-a-shit attitude that I am so in love with.
And together, they make girls (like me) go to Topman and buy unnecessary slogan t-shirts and socks for their brothers/boyfriends just to stay a little longer in front of the cashier for the best fad/decor/item in the entire store - the poster (first photo).
Yes, we are fragile, we are broken, we are romantics, but we care about how we look while at it.
I won't ask for a lot, just to spend forever looking at you (until time and age start to take over you lol).
Friday, March 18, 2011
Thursday, March 17, 2011
bla bla bla blarghhh
Darsa-warsa ini (haha karangan sekolah), semua orang nak jadi unik.
"Your singing is good, but you need to find what is it that's unique about you.." J.Lo berkata di American Idol.
"Wow..the taste is unique! I've never taste a pie like this before!" juri di Master Chef berkata.
"Awak kena jadi unik, apa yang orang boleh ingat tentang awak.." pakar motivasi memberi ceramah.
Jap, boleh tak kalau aku tak nak jadi unik? Aku nak jadi diri aku je.
Bibik sebelah rumah akan kata: Yaa Dik Ijjah! Kok itu kan dipanggil unik juga. Karena kan setiap insan itu berbeda-beda dari yang lainnya!
Pandai pula Bik Syoliha ni.
Kadang-kala tak salah bersetuju dengan pendapat Bik Syoliha, tapi salah kalau asyik guna nama dia. Haha! Sorry Bik! Nak spicekan sikit blog ni, so terpaksa lah. Kesian dia, walhal tak bersalah pun.
Speaking of which, aku rasa Bik Syoliha agak unik orangnya. Aku pernah nampak dia lap meja makan guna mop..a freaking MOP!! itu memang epik. Orang guna mop untuk lantai, dia buat jadi 2-in-1, mop untuk lantai and meja. Yuck!
Dan aku pernah ada bibik yang suka cubit-cubit roti Gardenia menjadi bebola kecil dan campak kan ke backyard. Like, kalau tengok backyard rumah aku, macam lautan cotton balls amidst the green grass. Baik makan roti tuh!
Also, Bik Syoliha ada habit suka ambil gambar dengan aku. Well, at least I have a fan! Sebelum dia nak ambil gambar, dia akan tukar baju, tukar tudung and pakai bedak. Then dia akan cuci gambar (kamera pakai filem) and post ke Indonesia. I bet I'm quite famous kat kampung dia tuh. Boleh buat homestay, haha!
Bik Syoliha juga bukanlah muda orangnya, tetapi dia masih takutkan gelap. Setiap kali malam menjelma dia akan mula menampakkan reaksi cemas diwajahnya dan dia akan berjalan lebih laju dari biasa. Aku selalu nampak dia berjalan ke kedai runcit seperti Flash.
Ok, cukuplah bercakap tentang Bik Syoliha. What if dia sebenarnya baca blog aku? Damn. haha.
Nak tidur. Goodnight.
p/s: I was hating my life for the past few weeks. But then again, I realized being emo is boring and even worse than actually pretending to be happy. So I chose to pretend to be happy, or like really be happy. But not emo. haha. kthxbye.
pp/s: Sorry about the 'Fuck You' post, I know it's quite vulgar. I still hate that person though.
"Your singing is good, but you need to find what is it that's unique about you.." J.Lo berkata di American Idol.
"Wow..the taste is unique! I've never taste a pie like this before!" juri di Master Chef berkata.
"Awak kena jadi unik, apa yang orang boleh ingat tentang awak.." pakar motivasi memberi ceramah.
Jap, boleh tak kalau aku tak nak jadi unik? Aku nak jadi diri aku je.
Bibik sebelah rumah akan kata: Yaa Dik Ijjah! Kok itu kan dipanggil unik juga. Karena kan setiap insan itu berbeda-beda dari yang lainnya!
Pandai pula Bik Syoliha ni.
Kadang-kala tak salah bersetuju dengan pendapat Bik Syoliha, tapi salah kalau asyik guna nama dia. Haha! Sorry Bik! Nak spicekan sikit blog ni, so terpaksa lah. Kesian dia, walhal tak bersalah pun.
Speaking of which, aku rasa Bik Syoliha agak unik orangnya. Aku pernah nampak dia lap meja makan guna mop..a freaking MOP!! itu memang epik. Orang guna mop untuk lantai, dia buat jadi 2-in-1, mop untuk lantai and meja. Yuck!
Dan aku pernah ada bibik yang suka cubit-cubit roti Gardenia menjadi bebola kecil dan campak kan ke backyard. Like, kalau tengok backyard rumah aku, macam lautan cotton balls amidst the green grass. Baik makan roti tuh!
Also, Bik Syoliha ada habit suka ambil gambar dengan aku. Well, at least I have a fan! Sebelum dia nak ambil gambar, dia akan tukar baju, tukar tudung and pakai bedak. Then dia akan cuci gambar (kamera pakai filem) and post ke Indonesia. I bet I'm quite famous kat kampung dia tuh. Boleh buat homestay, haha!
Bik Syoliha juga bukanlah muda orangnya, tetapi dia masih takutkan gelap. Setiap kali malam menjelma dia akan mula menampakkan reaksi cemas diwajahnya dan dia akan berjalan lebih laju dari biasa. Aku selalu nampak dia berjalan ke kedai runcit seperti Flash.
Ok, cukuplah bercakap tentang Bik Syoliha. What if dia sebenarnya baca blog aku? Damn. haha.
Nak tidur. Goodnight.
p/s: I was hating my life for the past few weeks. But then again, I realized being emo is boring and even worse than actually pretending to be happy. So I chose to pretend to be happy, or like really be happy. But not emo. haha. kthxbye.
pp/s: Sorry about the 'Fuck You' post, I know it's quite vulgar. I still hate that person though.
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
i spit it clean, just like Listerine
Do It Like This by the Black Eyed Peas
What's not to like? Mesh of a music video, karaoke clip, and video game.
I'm very much into cross-genre songs/music and all-things-art, as we speak. Especially in obvious experimental forms and deliberate rough mixes like oil and milk in a batter.
And also especially things that hipsters like but would pretend not to for fear of being called "mainstream". Haha.
Kids, if it's good, it's good. No matter. And yes, the Black Eyed Peas is mainstream. Go play with your indie alter-ego.
p/s: hail to BEP for The Beginning album. Bravo. *kissing fingers like French chefs upon wonderful cuisine*
Monday, March 14, 2011
disco superfly
Sex and Candy by Marcy Playground
Just the way he pauses in between the word candy: "can--dayy"
And his nonchalant singing with that occasional slight curve at the corner of his lips he has.
Holy smokes. Mega turn on.
I'd lounge in your chair anytime.
p/s: blue fluffy drumsticks ftw
Wednesday, March 09, 2011
Fuck You
Since you know all about me, you know who I am, you know what I'm made of, let me tell what you DON'T know about me.
I am not a fucking coward, I don't fucking give a fuck about you, I don't fucking care about anything but myself, I don't fucking rely on anybody and that's why you don't fucking get me. I fucking clean up my own fucking shit, I fucking hate people like you. I don't fucking need you in my life.
And yes, you're right. Your life IS fucking perfect, you ARE fucking perfect. And yes, my entire life is fucking screwed up, I am fucking screwed, everything about me is fucked up.
SO WHY DO YOU FUCKING CARE?!
Go fuck yourself, coz you're as fucked up as I am.
FUCK YOU.
I am not a fucking coward, I don't fucking give a fuck about you, I don't fucking care about anything but myself, I don't fucking rely on anybody and that's why you don't fucking get me. I fucking clean up my own fucking shit, I fucking hate people like you. I don't fucking need you in my life.
And yes, you're right. Your life IS fucking perfect, you ARE fucking perfect. And yes, my entire life is fucking screwed up, I am fucking screwed, everything about me is fucked up.
SO WHY DO YOU FUCKING CARE?!
Go fuck yourself, coz you're as fucked up as I am.
FUCK YOU.
Tuesday, March 08, 2011
Thank You
Apparently quite a number of people dig my crap.
I reached 100 followers a few days ago, and went whoa, these people actually read my blog? Guys, there's a reason why it's called mightycrap. Haha.
But anyways, THANK YOU for following. You are a mere 0.01% of the world population who are weird..like me.
Muchas gracias, virtualla amigos!
I reached 100 followers a few days ago, and went whoa, these people actually read my blog? Guys, there's a reason why it's called mightycrap. Haha.
But anyways, THANK YOU for following. You are a mere 0.01% of the world population who are weird..like me.
Muchas gracias, virtualla amigos!
Wednesday, March 02, 2011
Could have, but won't
Just as you see me as that, I see you as this.
Differences is better than indifference, and so we shalt agree to disagree.
We are nothing but two people on two separate boats, travelling on opposite ways.
Thanks for your two cents, and you can keep mine.
Differences is better than indifference, and so we shalt agree to disagree.
We are nothing but two people on two separate boats, travelling on opposite ways.
Thanks for your two cents, and you can keep mine.
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