You

Not quite a shadow

- that dark, wispy presence

that, as you turn, disappears

Nor that deep hum

- of a tune you can't recall

that, as you remembers, silents

But a glaring light,

- that glimmers ever so brightly

through the corneas of your eyes

to blind you from the darkness. 

Swimming in the Darkest Eyes

I swim in the darkest black
of your eyes

Those curtains to your windows
they seem so heavy

Your tears spill over
and trickle down your facade

The gaze I used to hold
move towards the gravity

I swim and I see
nothingness, weariness

Your soul has long begone
the body that you carry

Your eyes crowded
with nothing important

Your gaze is sharp
but it goes through me

Those eyes are my home
no more

Those eyes that used to light up
now are dim

Those eyes that first gave me butterflies
are now any stranger's eyes.

Why Didn't You Save Me?

Drowning
In the matter that is the world.

Suffocating
In the small space of insignificance.

Trembling
To grasp the fictitious whimper of hope.

Grasping
For the nonexistent scaffolding of strength.

Limping
Through coarse grizzles of broken lungs.

Screaming
In loud ignored whispers.

Waving, Crying, Kneeling
For help.

I Am the Ocean

I am the ocean
and you contain me
my high and low tides
in all the depth of the sea

I am the ocean
and you carry me
to greet the sandy shore
for a taste of my salinity

I am the ocean
and you are my gravity
in all my velocity, and
my immense capacity

I am the ocean
as you very well know me
I don't sink nor I float
- I only be

I am the ocean
to every degree
and you willingly sustain
through apogee and perigee

On "night"

by John Edgar Wideman

"..Night changes things. You can't see exactly how, but you can feel it in your bones. Spaces open up, which haven't been there before. You know that nights different, and you guess at why, and you wonder why, but you understand that you'll never understand, because the night is about things changing. The other fact about night, is the fact that it doesn't last, it's temporary. And like all good things it must come to an end.."



p/s: one of my favorite poetry slams, Def Poetry (or Def Jam Poetry founded by Russell Simmons et. al.), once showed Mos Def (the host) quoted Wideman's take on nights. Click here to watch.

bohong

oleh Mosyuki Borhan

bohongi aku tentang kau yang sudah berpunya
bohongi aku tentang kau yang sedang menukangi cinta dengan
kekasih lama
bohongi aku tentang senyummu serta bicara-bicara kita yang
cuma pura-pura

aku akan percaya semua bohong-bohongmu
untuk aku tak lagi mengingatimu

kerana
aku sedang membohongimu tentang menyukai dia yang
sebenarnya adalah kamu


nota kaki: lagi karya beliau, sila klik.

The house was quiet and the world was calm

By Wallace Stevens


The house was quiet and the world was calm.
The reader became the book; and summer night

Was like the conscious being of the book.
The house was quiet and the world was calm.

The words were spoken as if there was no book,
Except that the reader leaned above the page,

Wanted to lean, wanted much most to be
The scholar to whom his book is true, to whom

The summer night is like a perfection of thought.
The house was quiet because it had to be.

The quiet was part of the meaning, part of the mind:
The access of perfection to the page.

And the world was calm. The truth in a calm world,
In which there is no other meaning, itself

Is calm, itself is summer and night, itself
Is the reader leaning late and reading there.


-end-


To read at night, I think, creates a realm of autonomous solitude. In fact, doing anything at night gives you a sense of solitude. Have been surrounding myself with books these days - a habit that I have forgo not too long ago (yes, I shouldn't). I guess sometimes life just takes over, and you think if you don't get in the pulse of things you will be left behind. But no, not anymore. I have taken the calmer approach and just taking things really slow now. Certain events have made me realize that in the end, things will come around. So meanwhile, just kick back and relax. Do it like the Marley.

Sad Toys

by Ishikawa Takuboku

When I breathe,
This sound in my chest
Lonelier than the winter wind


In the opening poem of 'Sad Toys', translated by Sanford Goldstein and Seishi Shinoda.

At the edge of the edge

The perpetual conundrum of aspiration and reality will soon exhaust its entity. Is the prerogative mine to carve a decision of being only on one side? Will I regret the retrospective regret? Is the choice inevitable?

Walking Away

I just realized

There is such a concept

as, Walking Away

If I had known

That it was possible

I would have, Walked Away

But I was told 

I knew and I could

But I wouldn't, Walk Away

Kau Ni Kenapa?

by Tramizi Hussin


dalam titis-titis hujan yang turun ada kau,
rintik yang jatuh di mata ialah bundar matamu,
titis yang lepas ke tengkuk ialah manis bibirmu,
rambut basah di usik tanganmu; dada lencun ditindih gebu dadamu,

kuyup tubuh dimamah tubuhmu,
dan aku berteleku menikmati segalanya,
dalam hujan aku temu kau; dan antara rintik aku hancur merindui.



I must tell you, I effing love this piece of poetry. I haven't read/heard a good one for quite some time, and just coming across this, made me breathe a sigh of relief. Good poetry still exist. Especially in Malay - my mother tongue that I would not ever take for granted.

It's hard to write a poem without having to sound like you're trying too hard, what more to write it in Malay. Poets writing in Malay tend to be 'simplistic' with their ermm, presentation (?), eventhough they pile on the big words. To me, it's not the bombastic vocabulary you use, but rather how you use simple words that can mean many things.

The poem was included in the Pinggir Malam Yang Mati book of trio writers - Tramizi Hussin, Shafiq Halim and Zulwaqar Akram. It was published by Jargon Books, which I bought at one of those flea markets/bazaar thingamajigga I went to recently. I also met the famed (underground, sort of) maestro, Aloy Paradoks, in person and was kind of starstruck :p

Mr. Mystery Man

                         

The smell

- familiar.

Who are you?

A nobody

- just a person

who happens to be in your life.

The sight

- well, none.

Where are you?

A place

- very near.

As close as you want me to be.

The presence

- inevitable, unrepentant.

Why are you here?

A purpose

- for you.

I am the reason you live.

I make the blind see.

Apparatus

Let the balloons go
I've had someone say
But chase the chase of a dream

And just before you grasp
the entirety of it
in your hands,

record the wind underneath
keep the feeling in your hand

and then pull it by the string.

Let it float free
but tug at it when need be.

i am not

a legend
a role model
a whiz
a maestro
a beauty
a match
a good daughter

your expectations
bucketful of sunshines all the time
like every bit of your dream

perfect

somebody or
a person with potential to be somebody

a person who knows you anymore

coming back to where we were.

a glimpse

When you count the days
o went you count the days,
were you thinking of me?
o were you, were you?

Queen of Small Talks

Hi there
How are you
Where're you from
Yes I'm from here
No it's not my first time
Really
When
Haha no you don't look familiar to me
Maybe it's the beer
Oh it's juice
You're funny

I think she's great
She used to be in a band
Yes quite a weird wavering voice he has
I doubt he knows chinese
Oh what dialect is that

Wow you're great
Really
You know some
Like what

Haha
Cows eat grass
That's random
Who taught you that
Are you sure it's not a comic
What else

Oh haha hi
Ya nama saya Izza



(for Dominic from Austria with 'a bit of a German descent')

haiku for you

Drowned in blooded sea.
Gasping loudly for your name -
Can you still hear me?

Haiku pergi

Toleh belakang -
Lihatku dari jauh
Selamat tinggal.

afloat

Swimming in the horizon,
Ascending to the mountain,
But gravity. Gravity.

Could have, but won't

Just as you see me as that, I see you as this.

Differences is better than indifference, and so we shalt agree to disagree.

We are nothing but two people on two separate boats, travelling on opposite ways.

Thanks for your two cents, and you can keep mine.